December 4, 2019
I would be in the arms of my lover
thinking the same thoughts
but he must away and I can choose
the fullness of the earth and the next-best bliss
to swim in the sea.
December 15, 2019-After a Swim
I am grateful this morning to feel.
There is hope.
Life is real.
God sent his Son.
“earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal.”
January 20, 2020
What do you do?
when the world is a wonderland of frost, field and wood
when fog is crystals of light
when you have a cold, and the sea is perfect and friends heartily hail you
when the sand is iced
when you are in to your shoulders and see your breath.
You count it a blessing.
January 31, 2020
I woke up this morning.
Everything hurt.
Was it too much training or did that virus I’ve been fighting for two weeks
finally have its way with me?
The answer didn’t matter.
I put my feet on the floor.
I made breakfast.
Loved my family.
Took my children to school.
Cried.
Realised I could have fifteen minutes of ocean if traffic went smoothly.
Anticipation!
Can’t bother with a wetsuit.
I approached the sea waving to my friend Mairéad, a seasoned veteran of sea swimming.
As we went in together inch by inch I said, “do your thing, don’t let me slow you down.”
“This is my thing.” She retorted with an exasperated grin.
Smile.
Relax.
Feel.
Enjoy.
I did it! A swim in my togs.
It was short.
Next time
longer.
February 27, 2020 -Love letter to the Ocean
I came with love
And gifts of love
This is my normal
Not the torment.
I came, and felt the beauty,
the pain,
the warmth of friendship.
I want you to know I am loyal even when it is good.
I came
and you were the same.
Swimming after a Storm
You are not tame.
Reason gives caution
Warning
Don’t
Don’t
I need you.
It isn’t for me to demand, to determine,
to make you what I want.
I have to wait.
Wait for you to finish your work
Of organising the world
Wait until you
Are calm
Safe for me
One storm for another
I hate waiting
Quarantine
I can’t come to you.
I am trying to be content
In my lawful circle
I have found a distraction
like you
Yet not you
April 28, 2020
I went down in the morning
To a secluded spot
My own little isthmus of pebbles
There was foam on the river.
Scum.
In my togs I took a step in.
I bent to touch it with my hands.
I leaned forward for the glide muttering aloud, “I am committed now”.
Is it safe?
I didn’t put my face in.
Sighing and happy I went home again.
Until in the bath when I saw a red spots on my skin.
I wonder if repeat exposure will make it better?
May 7 2020-Replacement
I am forgetting
That must be it
I am finding pleasure without you
If you must know
It is the river
Somehow
I think you understand
How I need to escape
How I need to love
A little